Currently I have two pieces of work hanging in the Works on Paper Exhibit at the Sussex County Arts & Heritage Council. This exhibit will be on display until November 13th. Some photographs of the gallery can be seen on their website www.scahc.org . One of my pieces can actually be seen in one of their photographs, Studies in Nostalgia is being displayed on a pedestal.
I will be gallery sitting there this Saturday, October 30th. from Noon until 4.
Christmas 2010 by Amanda Predmore/AmiesArtandPhotos – Digital Photograph
Studies in Nostalgia by Amanda Predmore/AmiesArtandPhotos – Digital print made from an altered scan of a 4x5 B&W film negative.
I have serious problems making decisions. I don’t like being boxed in, being confined to only one idea. I over analyze most things way too much. These difficulties primarily surface under one of the following two conditions:
- I place too much Importance on the final outcome because I am trying to please someone else or I somehow get the idea into my head that it will define me.
- I don’t place enough importance on the final outcome because it’s something I don’t want to do, I don’t care about it, I’m depressed and don’t care about anything, it is not something that I really value, it’s something that I have no opinion one way or another about, or it does not engage my mind.
I don’t seem to have these problems when I do work for myself. When I feel strongly about something, like projects that I do for myself, I get the idea and then I just do it and re-do it and re-do it over and over until I am done. There is no over analyzing or anything. It is almost like there is no thought. There is really no time for thought, just action and reaction. Changes and redirection are made as necessary along the way. It just happens. I wish that I could do almost everything like this.
Please Do Not DisturB I wish that my mind would stop running away with itself. I need it to stay with me so I can use it. I get side tracked too easy.
I truly hate do not like one of the classes that I am taking right now. The material is beyond boring and presented in such a way that I am unable to focus on the reading. Most of the time I find myself re-reading the same page multiple times and still I have no idea what I read. Now, I’m not saying that I don’t understand or can’t comprehend what I am supposed to read. NO, it would be better described as not even comprehending that there are words on the page or sometimes even a book in my hands.
My mind is wandering so much. In the past when this has happened it has disappeared in anywhere from a few hours to a few days. This time it has been a problem all semester in almost everything that I have attempted to do, however it is most problematic in this one class. I fear that I will probably fail this class; I know that there is already no possible way that I can get a good grade. I also know that no matter what I do about this class, I will disappoint my family and friends. It seems like disappointing my family is all I ever do.
What might this have to do with art or my artistic process? Well, I spend most of my time studying for this one class. I do almost nothing else. I know that this class is necessary, if for nothing more than it is the last class that I need in order to graduate. The problem lies in that because of the time being monopolized primarily by banging my head against this brick wall of a class, I am forsaking my other class, my art, and my life.
Art and the act of creating is my life, it is also my primary way of attempting to communicate with the world and expressing myself. When I don’t create I begin to feel as if I am dying inside. It drains me. I have done almost nothing for far too long. I have no energy….. I am totally worn out….. I feel dazed and confused…….. I am beyond tired….. I cry myself to sleep almost every night…… I am falling in a dark seemingly bottomless hole and I am unable to catch myself or climb my way out at this time. I hope that I find the bottom soon so I can re-group and begin working on a way out.
Photograph of animal bones and skin found in the woods.
Ok, the honest truth behind why I have this blog is that I am required to have and maintain a blog for a class that I am taking. It is my choice to make it useful and fun for me, and I plan to continue to do so.
I am now required to add an image. However, I am also incredibly tired and bitchy and in one of my somewhat wacky moods. The result is this:
I need to have an image & the said image needs to have a caption. Above is the image and this is the caption.
Recently someone referred to me as “just an Art Groupie“. I AM NOT! I am an Artist, I am a Painter, I am a Photographer, I am a student…. I am so much more. I felt incredibly insulted and angry.
Because of how I felt about being called an “art groupie“, I could not help venting and complaining to some of my friends. My friends had a different way of looking at it, one which I have now happily adopted.
I now believe that being an “Art Groupie” is a good thing to be. My new definition of “Art Groupie” is; someone who lives and breathes Art, someone who constantly hangs out in galleries and museums, lives to study art, and is constantly creating. Sadly, I still do not view myself as an “Art Groupie“, however it is something that I now want to strive to be.
Sometimes it is not only good to turn a negative into a positive but it can also be beneficial to complain and vent to one’s friends. It can also be a beneficial practice to step back from a situation and attempt to find several new perspectives from which to view it. This can be true no matter if it is a physical situation, or a comment, or whatever, but especially when it is bothersome.